Different folks and different faith backgrounds within the Christian church meditate on different words or ideas during the four weeks of advent as they prepare for Christmas. This week I’m focusing on love. One of my favorite Christmas movies is Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. How I trembled at the sight of the Abominable Snowman when I was little. Gratefully, I’ve conquered that fear. Each year as I watch, I’m a little befuddled when Rudolph and his buddies arrive at the Island of Misfit Toys. To me, none of the toys live up to their “misfit” name. A cowboy riding an ostrich seems exotic. A toy gun that squirts jelly sounds super fun, especially if it’s strawberry, because yum. A Charlie in the Box is clever, and that spotted elephant is so stinking cute. I have no idea why he’s a misfit. And Dolly? No one in my family can even figure out what makes her not fit in. Yet, each of these toys bemoans their quirks, the things that make them different. They play the comparison game and end up feeling unloved and unwanted. Sounds a little bit like us. We wish we had skin like her, or a set of wheels like him. We think if only we had this aspect, that job, those boots, that relationship, or wore that size, then we’d be happy. But God tells us differently. God tells us we are His masterpieces, His perfect creations, who He has equipped for the specific work He has uniquely designed for us. God asks, “I made you in my image, why would you want to be any different? Why would you want to be like someone I created for an entirely different purpose and destiny than the phenomenal one awaiting you?” Why would we? Santa shows up on the Island of Misfit Toys and puts every toy in his bag. He doesn’t turn down any of them. Not one. Santa doesn’t say there’s no room for a train with square wheels or that only flying birds (not swimming ones) can sit with him. Santa sees and values each toy’s individuality. He understands that every toy has the power to bring joy and love into the heart of a child. Santa loves them all for exactly who they are. And at the end of the movie, when each misfit toy grabs a colorful umbrella and floats to the home of their future child owner, they are transformed. They are still them—polka dots, square wheels and all—but they realize their potential, they begin to see their true reflections. And when we understand how loved we are by our Creator, that He crafted us perfectly and intentionally, that there’s room for all of us in God’s kingdom, that He doesn’t reject any of us, not a one, that our uniqueness can accomplish things no one else can accomplish, that we each have the power to bring love and joy to this world, just as we are, then we too, can begin to see our true reflections.
This is what Christ’s love looks like—a flawless mirror showing us we are not misfits. We are worthy, and we are treasured. As you light your Christmas candles or your tree or plug in your giant yard blow-up Minions with Santa hats, breathe in God’s incomparable love, and remember that to Him you have infinite value.
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I got my hair done yesterday—trimmed, highlighted, eyebrows waxed. I had let it go w-a-y too long. My ends were split. My roots were dark. Stray brows were pricking up in random places. To be honest, I’ve barely had time to even look in the mirror the last couple of weeks, let alone tend to my appearance. Sure I’ve washed my face and brushed my teeth, slathered on moisturizer morning and night. Dotted foundation under my eyes and brushed a quick coat of mascara on my lashes. But that’s been about the extent of it in September. This morning I notice a difference. All of my pieces are a little better assembled. It oddly motivates me to put on an outfit, instead of leaving my workout clothes on all day. I might even remember to slide in a pair of silver hoops. We all have days where we look (and feel) more put together than others, but in all days, we are still exactly how God planned for us to be. I was reminded of this at a recent trip to the zoo with my kiddos. I know some of you are opposed to zoos, and I get it, because the animals are confined, and that’s an issue. But I love the zoo, because I find each animal so incredibly remarkable. Because they remind me of God’s handiwork. They’re all so crazy different, and yet so unfathomably amazing. They help me remember how God made you and me and how when He created us it wasn’t random, but intentional—as an artist painstakingly brushes colors of paint on their canvas. The next time you feel like you’re having a bad hair day, or like you hate your hair in general, think of the lion and his majestic mane sticking out in every direction and yet, signifying royalty and grace, perfect exactly how it is, exactly how God intended it to be. The next time you think your nose is too long or too small or too crooked or too pointy, consider the elephant. Her trunk amazes us. Our noses also have purpose. They’re how we breathe. #Grateful. And the cozy, comforting scent of a PSL or lavender oil or fresh flowers from the farmer’s market all come to us via our snouts, no matter what their shape or size. Not to mention smell enables us to taste. And I’m oh so thankful I have the gift of being able to taste the salty-sweet of a fig prosciutto pizza or the scrumptiousness of a chocolate chip cookie hot out of the oven. You? If you ever think your ________ is too long or too short or too small or too big remember the elegant giraffes. I’ve never looked at one and thought, “You know their necks are too long.” No. I say, “Wow, they are so graceful, so tall.” That’s how God sees us, too, phenomenal, just the way He formed us. Who are we to question the shape and structure God has given us? Can you imagine any of these animals any other way? From a step back we can see purpose and beauty in each creature’s unique features. God can see purpose and beauty in each of our unique features too. So no matter if you’re way overdue for an appointment with your barber or if you have a standing date with your stylist, no matter if you’re going for a run or always feel like you’re on the run, remember that the God who created the world, and all of it’s amazing creatures, also created you. And He did so with intentionality and precision, so that He could call you His masterpiece. You are Christ’s masterpiece Ephesians 2:10
What is your favorite feature and why are you grateful for it? I’d love to hear. There’s been a lot of chatter about the article in Time, Are Disney Princesses Hurting Your Daughter’s Self-Esteem? I have a lot of friends who cringe at the word “princess”, who smirk at the mention of “Prince Charming”, but me, I grew up wishing I was Cinderella. It’s not that I had a wicked stepmother. My mom is the most generous, loving, giving woman I’ve ever met. But the idea of scrawny, nerdy me with ribs poking out, giant glasses and a propensity to bump into and trip over everything in sight possibly having someone fall in love with me? Well that sounded too good to be true, but awfully nice to dream about. Disney princesses are not evil. They’re fantasy. And, I find them quite inspiring. Some of the princesses in question were originally published in a book in 1812 by the brothers Grimm. Disney’s Snow White released back in 1937. If you’re concerned about how women are portrayed in these classic tales, take a moment to consider other media put out in those years and how women were depicted; consider the culture they were released in. But if there is anything in a Disney movie, or any movie for that matter, that goes against your beliefs or values, you have a choice. You get to choose if you or your family watches. And once you make that choice, you have a responsibility to act upon that choice. Parents, you can’t just pop in the DVD and disappear. You need to watch these movies with your kids and talk about the strengths and weaknesses of the characters, the lessons learned. There are some kick butt princesses out there—Merida from Brave, Tiana from The Princess and the Frog, and Rapunzel from Tangled with her frying pan as a weapon and her decision to chop her locks and go brunette. These girls are way more recent than 1959’s Sleeping Beauty and much stronger and independent, as well. You might be sick of hearing “Let it Go,” but Elsa wanted nothing to do with a prince. She was fighting the battle of trying to please others, of her own self-doubts and insecurities. And her sister, Anna, learned that the real man of her dreams was not the apparently charming royalty, but the somewhat clumsy, singing-to-reindeer, ice merchant guy who loves her for who she is. Not bad lessons, these. Even older classics like Cinderella impress the value of good friends (Jacques and Gus), the idea we should never give up, and the concept of an amazing man rescuing us, which sounds a lot like Jesus to me. And that is someone to put my hope in. The truth is, parents are responsible for guiding their children through all of their media choices, not just Belle and Ariel. And as we grow older, we are also responsible for our own media consumption. Fifteen minutes into The Wolf of Wallstreet as an adult and I had to turn it off. Maybe you loved it. Leo is an amazing actor and Scorsese one of the best filmmakers. But I couldn’t stomach the demoralization and objectification of women in the opening scenes. To me those fifteen minutes were capable of way more damage to a girl’s perception of what she’s supposed to look like and how she’s supposed to be treated than a lifetime of watching Beauty and the Beast. Ask yourself if you were more affected by reading a Disney picture book about Pocahontas every day after Kindergarten or 50 Shades of Gray as an adult? As a writer, I am a proponent of freedom of speech and of artistic expression. Artists should use their God-given gift of creativity to express themselves, to entertain, to make a statement. It is up to us to decide what media we feel is safe for our families and ourselves to consume. And that decision is personal and individual. If Cinderella’s not your girl, you might like Mulan, the story of a young Chinese woman who becomes one of the greatest warriors in the Asian empire. Just like we have the right to freedom of speech in America, we also have the freedom to choose. So choose wisely for yourself and your family. If the media you’re consuming hardens your heart, goes against your core values, is something you turn off or shut down when someone else enters the room, reconsider. Choose music that inspires you and makes you dance. Choose shows that make you laugh, give you goosebumps, or teach you something new. Choose books that make you think and cry and hope and dream. Choose movies that do the same. And whether you’re selecting media for your children or for yourself be intentional about your choices. I grew up longing for a Prince Charming, hoping one day The Perfect Guy would sweep me off my feet and change everything. After countless unhealthy relationships I was blessed to marry the man of my dreams, but my awesome husband can’t be perfect. He’s human after all. But there is a Perfect Guy for me, and for you, but that guy, is Jesus. That idea imprinted on me as a girl dreaming of being Cinderella, that someday, somehow, someone would rescue me, was real. Someone would. Someone did. I just didn’t understand my Prince was the Prince of Peace. I certainly don’t blame Disney for my misunderstanding. If anything it cemented my desire to be rescued, so when Jesus did rescue me, I craved it, I grabbed His hand and let Him take me away from my old life and into my new.
What are your thoughts on princesses old and new and how they shape our views? Do you have a favorite princess? Amy Schumer is in a rant because she was included in Glamour’s plus-size special issue and Glamour didn’t even tell her that’s what she was agreeing to. It doesn’t make me rant, but it makes me sad, because I can’t figure out why there is even such thing as a plus-size issue. Earlier this spring Sports Illustrated patted themself on the back for featuring a “plus-size” model on one of their three swimsuit edition covers and now Glamour brags about inspiring body positivity by segregating plus-size models into a separate issue? I like SI and Glamour, but why did all of a sudden the fashion industry decide they are good citizens for including “plus size” women in their mix? Shouldn’t beauty magazines always be promoting beauty—all kinds and shapes and sizes of beauty? When a fashion mag titles something a “plus-size issue” they are labeling this as an alternative type of beauty, as if it’s not normal beauty, but beauty that goes in a separate issue, not a regular issue. Glamour doesn’t come across as applauding bigger sizes but segregating them. Do we classify each other’s sunset pictures on Instagram by ranking them on a scale of 1-10? No! They’re all beautiful in their own right. Can you tell me if a lily, a rose or a daffodil is more beautiful? Every time I pass my Easter lily I swoon at its perfume. I stop and stare at the elegant trumpet-shaped blooms. If I look just past it out my kitchen window, I see the completely different buttercup-shaped daffodils decorating my yard. They don’t have the heavy aroma of lilies but the fresh, sweet scent of springtime. My point? They are both stunning. And if you added in delicate daisies or gorgeous roses to the mix, you’d still be hard-pressed to prove that one flower or even one type of flower is more beautiful than another. And these are just flowers. Imagine the diverse beauty of women! So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. Genesis 1:27 NKJV And so it is with God’s image-bearers, there are women He created in all shapes and sizes. So why do we jump to measure a woman’s worth, put her into neat tidy categories based on the numbers on the scale, or the measurement of her waist, or the size on the label inside her jeans. True beauty is celebrating who we are, who God made us to be, our true reflections, not saying one of us is better or worse no matter what our size is. I know Amy Schumer is concerned because she was labeled. She has a huge fan base, so she’s also concerned about what that label will do to distort others’ body image. But what if we did away with the labels all together, and celebrated our original, beautiful selves? What if the beauty industry chimed in and celebrated the beauty of all women? That means we will not compare ourselves with each other as if one of us were better and another worse. We have far more interesting things to do with your lives. Each of us is an original. Gal 5:26 Glamour editor, Cindi Leive, writes "many Glamour readers who wear size 14 and up tell us they don't see images celebrating their shape as often as they'd like."
So why not incorporate size 14 and up beauties right along with waif-like models and models with medium bone structures into all of your issues all of the time? Have dark-skinned and light-skinned models, tall and short models, red heads, blondes and brunettes all touting “how to dress for the heat” and sporting the “hottest colors for spring”. Dove rocks at this! Have you seen their ads touting, “We see beauty all around us.” Even some local mags, like Minneapolis/St. Paul’s shopping guide feature a broad array of beautiful women on the cover. These images make God smile, because He sees the true beauty in all of these women, and He wants us to do the same. The beauty industry claims they are embracing a broader view. I challenge them to open their eyes a little wider—to stop pigeon holing different body types, and instead to embrace and highlight all female body types for what they are, truly, uniquely beautiful. I challenge us to let it begin with us, to embrace our own body types, and celebrate exactly how we were made by the One who Created us. Have you seen any ads or publications that do a great job of celebrating all types of beauty? I'd love to hear about it. Share in the comments below. Last week my husband was complaining of headaches. Last week I kept looking in the mirror and thinking I looked pasty, like strangely pale. Turns out he was making himself his usual two shots of espresso each morning, but he was using the decaf. Ouch! Turns out, the new bottle of foundation I bought was two shades lighter than I normally get. Ew! Brett had fooled himself into thinking his dose of caffeine would wake him up, and I was tricking myself into believing my make-up would even out my skin tone. It was unintentional, but it was our faults, because we weren’t looking hard enough at the truth. We were in too much of a hurry, too much of a routine, felt like we had it all under control, when clearly we did not. But the result of all of our self-imposed hoodwinking was both of our heads were messed up. Gheesh! You’d think we could count on ourselves! But we are guilty of self-imposed unintentional deception. We tell ourselves lies. All the time. “If I just lost five pounds.” “If I just had a job lined up.” “If I just played for that team.” “If I just got this deal.” “If I just looked like/sounded like/performed like her.” And the result of lying to ourselves about our worth—that we would be better off if we were different—is much more damaging than a headache or looking ghostly. We tell ourselves we’re not enough. And when we do that, we take away from the beautiful creations God made us to be. Why do we deceive ourselves? Why do we fall into the routines of life, rushing around in a hurry without taking the time to open our eyes and examine the truth? But you are the ones chosen by God, chosen for the high calling of priestly work, chosen to be a holy people, God’s instruments to do his work and speak out for him, to tell others of the night-and-day difference he made for you—from nothing to something, from rejected to accepted. 1 Peter 2:9-10 We are chosen by God. Chosen for high work. Chosen to be holy. He loved us so much He died for us. He must love us, immensely, if He was willing to die for us. To Christ we matter. To Him we have value. To Him we are not something to be rejected. He has already accepted us, fully. Why would we ever tell ourselves otherwise? I mean the world tricks us plenty. You’d be happier if you drank this beer, wore these yoga pants, had this hairstyle, etc. The world cajoles us into thinking we have to look or act a certain way, that we need a prom date or an SUV, that we need to live in a certain neighborhood or have a certain relationship status to be content. The world makes us believe who we are and what we do is not enough. God tells us the opposite. God loves us for who we are, exactly who we are. He doesn’t care how many miles we logged, how many points we scored, which income bracket we fall into, or if we check married, single, divorced, or widow on our tax returns. He just loves us. For us. Because He made us. Exactly how we are.
It’s time to discard both the lies the world is telling us today, and the ways we’re deceiving ourselves. We need to take time to focus on how excellently formed and marvelously functioning we truly are, exactly as we are. We need to run with this truth, embrace and own it, without ever worrying about how we measure up or compare to someone else, because that’s just messing up our pretty priceless heads. We need to instead just go ahead and be what we were made to be, our own true beautiful reflections. Are you rushing around believing what’s in front of you, because it’s there, because it’s easy? Are you conning yourself into how you can be energized or how you can feel beautiful? Or are you taking time to examine the truth? The truth that God loves you. Are you deceiving yourself today? Telling yourself you’re not enough? Telling yourself you fall short? That if you just did (fill in the blank) you'd be better? Take a breath. Open your eyes. Wider. Look at what’s really going on. Examine who you truly are. Because you are more than enough for the one true King, therefore, you are enough. So since we find ourselves fashioned into all these excellently formed and marvelously functioning parts in Christ’s body, let’s just go ahead and be what we were made to be, without enviously or pridefully comparing ourselves with each other, or trying to be something we aren’t. Romans 12:6 Life isn’t a fairy tale. But in the 2007 movie Enchanted it is. Well, until the beautiful Disney cartoon damsel gets thrown into a well by the wicked stepmother and gets catapulted into the scary land known as dun dun dun Manhattan. As out of place and crazy as Giselle, the idyllic princess, seems when she lands in New York, she does something we don’t do enough, something I don’t do enough. She boldly and unaffectedly notices and comments on the true beauty of individuals around her. When Robert and his daughter spy Giselle helpless and stranded in the Big Apple, they take pity on her and let her stay with them for the night. The next morning, Robert’s girlfriend, Nancy, arrives at the apartment and throws a fit when she finds another woman there. Nancy full of New York style and attitude couldn’t be more different than Giselle (who showed up the night before in the poufiest dress in the history of the world and her hair in mounds of ringlets). But instead of noticing their differences, or returning Nancy’s snarky comments, or questioning why Nancy isn’t dressed in ribbons and ruffles, Giselle sincerely exclaims, “Oh, she is lovely.” Later in the film, Giselle approaches a woman in Robert’s office and says, “Oh my goodness, your hair is lovely. You’re beautiful. The man who holds your heart is a lucky fellow indeed.” And to the woman’s husband, who is in the midst of divorcing his wife, Giselle proclaims, “You are lucky, just look at the way your wife’s eyes sparkle.” Do you approach strangers and compliment them that specifically? You don’t have to say it like Giselle—in princess speak—but imagine approaching someone, looking them in the eye, and saying:
Why not? What’s holding you back? What if we truly noticed beauty in everyone? In Matthew 5:14, Jesus tells us, “You’re here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in the world.” Are we shining that light? Are we brightening those around us, illuminating their true beauty? It sounds totally dorky. But why? Why have we embraced such a satirical state that genuinely approaching friends, let alone strangers, and telling them how marvelous they are feels weird? We’ve been called to cheer others on. Paul explains it like this in Ephesians 5: 17,19 Therefore do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the Lord is… Speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs.
Giselle wasn’t too far off, singing all the time. When someone genuinely compliments me, it makes my day brighter, so why wouldn’t I take opportunities to shine light like that to others? I’m not talking stalker style. I’m not talking insincere, fake compliments either. I mean truly noticing the beauty and talents of those around us just as we notice the beauty of a flower or appreciate the flavor of a decadent brownie. Think what a difference we could make if each of us gave an authentic compliment to a stranger today. Tomorrow I’m attending a prayer service at my kids’ school, running a few errands, and taking one of my children to soccer practice. I have multiple opportunities to identify and point out true beauty in others. I’m challenging myself, and you, too, to seek true beauty in someone the next place you go. Who knows whose day we could brighten? It could lighten someone’s dark mood, bring a smile to someone on the verge of tears, give hope to someone feeling hopeless. A compliment could remind one of God’s beautiful children of their beautiful true reflection. I’d love to hear, leave a comment on the blog sharing how do you plan on shining some light today? There’s been a lot of hype about the annual swimsuit edition of Sports Illustrated. This year, the magazine is promoting the fact that they ran not one, but three covers to promote what true beauty looks like. “It’s always been an objective of mine to be more inclusive and be more representative of what real beauty is,” MJ Day, editor of the issue explains in an interview with People magazine. The covers feature: 1. Typical young thin blonde model, Hailey Clauson 2. Muscular women’s fighter, Ronda Rousey 3. Countercultural size 14 model, Ashley Graham I love the buzz around embracing different body types and being more inclusive in our definitions of beauty. I am a huge proponent of embracing true beauty, that each of us is a unique, perfect masterpiece. But, Sports Illustrated, I am so confused! We’ve come so far in celebrating the inner strength, true beauty and athletic prowess of women’s athletes like Carli Lloyd, 2015 FIFA player of the year. We’ve brilliantly praised the true beauty of curvy-figured Adele whose heart-wrenching voice stirs our souls. So how can we be okay with the number one magazine sold and viewed by on average, 23 million people, bringing in over $1 billion, to be of naked women under the guise of “sports” and “embracing beauty”? It disturbs me. And it breaks my heart. As a mother and advocate for women of all ages, here is what I want to say to each cover girl and to Sports Illustrated about how we should define true beauty. Cover girl #1, Hailey Clauson you are beautiful. But Sports Illustrated, how is showcasing her wearing only a g-string and squashing her breasts with her hands embracing her true beauty? I have two daughters. There has never been a day that I have thought I would build my girls’ self-confidence by telling them to dress scantily or draw attention to themselves by exposing their bodies. Not once. This is not how I want them to view beauty, or how I hope they aspire to define their worth. I also have two sons, and I do not want them to see this image, drop their jaws, drool, and think, this is what I’m looking for in a girl. This is what defines beauty. This cover doesn’t embrace the whole beautiful package of Hailey, but only her physique displayed in objectified positions. Cover girl #2, Ronda Rousey, you are beautiful. Sports Illustrated, you chose her to make a statement that strong, athletic bodies are beautiful. My daughters are athletes. I love that they find confidence and self-esteem in working hard, playing as a team, giving it their all and pushing their bodies to be strong. But SI, your athlete “role model” is naked. Yes, nude, as in zero clothing, just body paint. Not a stitch of swimsuit. And the last time I checked, paint does not count as clothes. How is placing Ronda, naked with a tapestry painted on her torso, embracing her talent, skill, drive, strength, accomplishments, girl power, which is integral to her true beauty? Cover girl #3, Ashley Graham, you are beautiful. Your smile is dazzling and I’m so impressed that you have been an advocate for eliminating the word “plus size” from our vocabulary, especially within the fashion and magazine industry. You even rocked a Ted Talk proclaiming we should just say, “my size.” But Sports Illustrated, you brag Ashley is the “first plus-size cover model” to grace your publication. SI you’ve not only ignored Ashley’s personal cause, but thrown it back in her face, or should I say, her bikini. All of this has been on my mind since I saw an interview with the cover girls on Good Morning America. I’ve been mulling it over. Thinking through it. Excited that people are out there talking about body image, that interviews are taking place about how beautiful all body types are, but at the same time truly frightened about the ramifications of good intentions with scary results. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. 1 Corinthians 6:19
When I opened my mailbox last week to see a topless Hailey Clauson smiling at me, I felt violated. My fourteen-year old son subscribes to SI. He’s a sports fanatic. But because the swimsuit issue has been risqué for years, we check the box on his subscription card to get the full year of Sports Illustrated WITHOUT the swimsuit issue. Yes, even when we deliberately chose that these images would not mold our sons’ or daughters’ views of what true beauty is Time Inc. still delivered it to our household. What? I tossed the magazine in the recycler. But its contents are haunting me. It concerns me that this was delivered to at least three million other mailboxes, that at lease another million people purchased it at newsstands, that more than 23 million other pairs of eyes will see objectified, naked women under the distorted lens of calling this ‘celebrating true beauty’. True beauty is what lights you up inside. True beauty is your laugh, the way your eyes sparkle, yes, your specific and unique curves, height, skin color and hair texture. But not as individual parts, not as body parts, and those body parts weren’t made to be exploited. Just as Seurat’s pointillism painting, “A Sunday on La Grande Jatte,” isn’t about a certain shade of green he used or the child in the forefront of the painting or the size of the canvas, it is a masterpiece because a million dots in a range of colors, all come together to create one beautiful picture. That is like each of us, a million different components, strengths, weaknesses, likes, dislikes, talents, skills, insights, smiles, curves of eyebrows, all coming together to create beautiful, individual masterpieces. This is what we need to celebrate. I would love to see Time Inc. truly take this on, but they aren’t doing so with this year’s swimsuit covers. How do you feel about the swimsuit issue? Leave a comment below if you think Sports Illustrated is broadening or narrowing our view of beauty? “All you need is love,” the Beatles sang to me when I listened to them non-stop in junior high. “The greatest of these is love,” the Bible reminded me in 1 Corinthians 13 as I searched for answers and understanding of this life. And they were both right. Only I didn’t know where to find love. So I looked in all of the wrong places. I searched for love in the form of approval – maybe if I got good grades I would be loved, if I got great grades I’d have an even better chance. I searched for love in the eyes of guys I dated—maybe if they thought I was pretty, or funny, or fun they’d love me, I’d be loved. I looked for love in my job—if I succeeded, did another deal, got another promotion my co-workers would respect me, my boss would be proud of me, and those things are kind of like love, aren’t they? Kind of. But not really. Because all of those types of love slip through our fingers. They’re temporary. There will always be another test to take, another dance to find a date to, and another deal to land. Once the quick fix of approval is over, the buzz of being sought or appreciated dies down, so does the love. Where are you looking for love today? There is one true love. A love so real, so true, and so fulfilling I can’t get my mind or arms around it. It is the love of Jesus. His love letter to us is the Bible. It starts with Him creating the world, a beautiful place for us to live, because He loves us. He created each of us, exactly how we are, no matter what are grades are, no matter what are relationship status is, no matter what size or shape we are, no matter how successful by worldly standards we are. God’s love letter goes on to explain what He’s done, what He will do for us. He’ll part seas for us. He’ll knock down walls for us. He’ll pull us out of fiery furnaces. He’ll slay our giants. And then, as if that weren’t enough to show us how deeply and completely He loves us—Jesus will take all of our imperfections and mistakes and wash them clean. I mean, who does that? Only someone who loves us utterly and unconditionally. All the years that I searched for love on Valentine’s Day, that I longed for an extra special heart to be stuffed in my decorated box, or for flowers to be delivered at my door, or for Prince Charming to arrive on his white steed, I already had love all along, and so do you. Jesus loves you. He made you. He died for you. And He wants to be your Valentine. And once we truly let that sink in, allow His love to flow over us, stop trying so hard and comparing ourselves to all the people and things we are not—that we were never intended to be—once we realize we were created to be exactly who we are, and that we are loved for our individual priceless unique selves, then we can feel the real love of God that completes us. And when we accept that true love, we can also begin to love ourselves, to see ourselves for our true lovely selves, see our true reflections. And once we know where to find true love, then we can realize love IS all we need and the greatest of these IS love.
I’d to hear your favorite Valentine’s recipes or traditions or your favorite parts of God’s love letter. Share in the comments section below. I have coffee splatters on the console of my car and a smear of toothpaste on my bathroom counter. A drop of shimmery lavender nail polish marks the top of my planner. There’s a spot on my jeans that’s been there so long, I’m not sure how it got there, but my suspicions are it’s chocolate in one form or another. And then last night, somebody (no one will be named) dropped a piece of pizza on the living room carpet. Which happens to be white. With six of us running at full speed, our house is lived in, to say the least. The dropped pizza was no big deal. But I couldn’t let the red splash of tomato sauce just sit in the middle of the floor, so I dug under the sink for that carpet spray stuff. I read the back and sprayed and scrubbed and scrubbed a little more. And then I turned it around—reading the label, Spot Remover. Which made me laugh, because yesterday morning when I’d washed my face and noticed the twin zits on the end of my chin, I’d gotten out a product called Super Spot Remover—the cleverly named zit gel I keep handy for just such occasions. I am covered in spots! But my spots aren’t just literal spots. I am also covered in spots you can’t see. Splatters when I yell at one of my kids instead of talking through a rough moment. Dribbles when I forget to bring the dessert or sign the form or write the check or text back. Giant globs when I recall how I tucked God under my pillow in college and did things my way instead of leaning on Him. Shameful spots for things I’ve done in my past. Stains as I struggle with a broken relationship. Big blobs whenever I doubt God’s perfect plans in the every day (how will I ever get everything done on my to-do list?) or in the big decisions of life (where should my daughter go to college?). I could go on. I am covered in so many spots inside and out that I resemble a leopard. And although I use stain stick on my clothes, spot remover on my carpet and face, spray on my counters, there is no cool new product that can clean my inside spots. It’s like the animal in the children’s book, Put Me in the Zoo. He can change the color and size of his spots. He can put them on the wall or on a tree, “But then,” the animal says, “All my spots are back on me.” And I can smile and laugh and apologize. I can move forward and try to bury my past and doubts and insecurities and shame and guilt under the busyness of the week or the façade of having it all together. I can try harder, work more, do better, but in the end all my spots are back on me. Or at least I used to think so. But I’ve discovered the ultimate spot remover. And it doesn’t come in a bottle, it never expires and it’s absolutely free. It’s having a relationship with Jesus. See, He scrubbed all of my spots clean. So clean, He who knows everything about me—all my breakdowns and blunders—completely forgives me and loves me and doesn’t notice those old spots at all. But the fact is, it was our pains He carried--
our disfigurements, all the things wrong with us. We thought He brought it on Himself, that God was punishing Him for His own failures. But it was our sins that did that to Him, that ripped and tore and crushed Him--our sins! He took the punishment, and that made us whole. Through His bruises we get healed. Is 53:5 No more spots to stick in a box or on a tree. No more spots can come back on me. Or on you. Whatever our spots may be, whatever color or size they are, no matter where we’ve tried to stick them or how we’ve tried to change them, Jesus died so that all of my sins and yours, all of our mistakes and failures past, present, and future were nailed to the cross and washed completely clean. And with all of those spots removed once and for all, we can clearly see our beautiful true reflections. Do you have any spots you're working on removing? I'd love to hear. Leave a comment on the Read More or Comments tab below. Have you ever eaten an apple from Walmart? Sure all of the apples in the ready-to-go, easy-to-carry, plastic bag are the same shape and size. They’re even all the same color. Even if they’re multi-colored apples, it’s uncanny how they manage to package eight apples with the exact shade and portion of yellow marbled into the exact hue and percentage of red all in the same bag. But once you bite into one of those look-alike apples, you forget you’re eating an apple. Instead you get a mouthful resembling mealy cardboard. Have you ever picked apples in an orchard? Off a real, live tree? Or at least purchased apples from an apple farmer, at a roadside stand, or a farmer’s market? They’re all unique. One might have a ding. Another an uneven spot. You might find one with its stem and leaf still attached. Their surfaces aren’t as smooth or shiny (translate waxy) as the ones at Walmart. Even apples from the same tree are different sizes with distinctive curves. Ever bitten into one and experienced the layering of sweet and tart, crisp and juicy, like crunching morsels of cider? These apples are like ambrosia. It’s almost blasphemy to use the same word to label this fruit as the kind they’re calling apples at Walmart. God created us to be orchard apples. Not Walmart apples. Got that? He designed each and every one of us in His image. He knows exactly how much water we need, what kind of fertilizer we require, how to keep the pests away. He appreciates us when we are seeds, seedlings, beautiful pink blossoms in the spring, and as we grow into solid fruit. He doesn’t judge us along the way, try to grow us in a rush, pick us too early, or stuff us in a plastic bag and ship us before we’re ripe. See, God made us; therefore He loves who we are at every stage of our life, our dings, our rough spots, our natural surfaces. He doesn’t ask us to be anything we’re not, or try to cram us into a bag, force us to like someone else. No, through His love, God helps us become the best versions of ourselves. Much like those fresh from the orchard apples. Some of us are sweet, and some of us are tart, and some of us are a mix of both. We are red and green and gold and pink and all kinds of swirling combinations. A Granny Smith does not want to be like a Golden Delicious, she’s too sassy for that. A Pink Lady has no aspiration to be a Honey Crisp, because she’s amazingly sweet and crisp and beautiful just like she is. Each apple just tries to be itself, because that’s who it was made to be. Us too. We need to relish in who we were made to be our Creator. Remember you are an orchard apple, not a Walmart one, so delight in the layers of your personality, your one-of-a-kind shape, size and flavor. I love to bake. One of my family’s favorites this time of year is Apple Crisp. The secret to this recipe is to use a variety of apples. The different degrees of sweet and tart, crisp and soft all meld together when they bake into something unbelievably scrumptious. We deal with gluten and nut allergies, but this dessert is safe for all of us to savor. It is warm and sweet and spicy. Top it with some vanilla ice cream that melts over the crunchy topping, and you’re pretty close to this side of heaven. You don’t need any skills to make it, just a great variety of farmer’s market apples and a peeler. Apple Crisp
Ingredients: 7 medium-sized apples peeled and sliced thinly. A variety is best, some gold, some green, and some red. Mix it up. 1 cup dark brown sugar ½ cup melted butter 1 ½ cups gluten free rolled oats (you can use regular, but don’t use steel cut, they don’t work as well) ½ cup gluten free flour (I use a ready-made blend, but you can make your own blend, or use GF oat flour or use regular flour. They all work the same.) ½ tsp. Cinnamon Dash Nutmeg Dash Ginger Vanilla Ice Cream or if you’re feeling festive, whipped cream Preheat oven to 375 degrees
What's your favorite way to serve apples in the fall? |
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